The Doubt, 14 day countdown, Aug 30, 2019

Did I do a good job training or not?  Overall, I feel great about what I’ve done, the massive amount I’ve learned, the records/improvements I continue to make weekly, the solid effort I have done every week – I never half ass a workout.  But –

Sometimes I forgot to do things like askill workout or flexibility like crossover symmetry.  or to read the sheets carefully and just totally missed something.

Sometimes I purposefully didn’t do things – had issues on Wednesdays and often missed the Wed or Thurs bike ride.  Was just too beat down from work and got home just in time to eat and it was 9pm.  Spent a few minutes (literally) before bed with my awesome husband 🙂

How could I follow within +/- 5g a day a food plan for 7+ months yet struggle so much in maintenance?  Here I am, not sure what I should weigh, if I am eating too much (as I did gain a few pounds), or too little (I was tired and felt better eating more).  And I keep having this little Baileys drink too often….

I definitely do not have the body I thought I would have after this – no sixpack, weak arms due to shoulder issues.  Upper body strength has been my biggest disappointment as I am typically great at that but temporarily weak with the shoulder (right and left) issues.  I have recovered from left surgery well and know I’ll regain all but I can’t (won’t) do the overhead obstacles at Killington for fear of reinjury and not enough practice/strength.

I have also overcome major, major back pain by improving my posture, not doing any barbell two legged weight exercise and working single legged weights – I can run any distance and not be absolutely crippled at the end with back spasms like I used to be.  Its not totally fixed though as a recent “take my back for a spin with a bunch of empty bar front squats” resulted in having minor spasms and creakiness for about two weeks 🙂

I missed some of the crossfit workouts.  I struggled with enough hours in the day to do aerobic, crossfit, skills, flexibility and do my job.  Sometimes I made the decision to stay late at work to reduce the guilt there.

I have thoroughly enjoyed this last year and the process of getting better.  I have also learned how crazy happy I can be after doing something I was terrified about – ie Boston Super twice.  I was going to say give me the journey without the race except my friend told me the race is the “gift” you get at the end and I’ll take that too.

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