Category Archives: Becoming Badass


First day of STFU training – after my hour run in the snow, I found the salt bucket in the garage and carried it around the neighborhood.  I love that kind of stuff. I hadn’t really done it last month as planned I think because it was too easy – make it harder and I’m all in 🙂

First week of phase 4 training this week with the intensity increasing – see bike workout below from yesterday where I did a bunch of intervals thruout the workout ending with a 20 sec max effort, 10 s rest for 4 minutes:


Already had a back spasm so better get on the floor to do a few stretches/mobility wod today…  Am tired just thinking of the next two days getting ready to go to Bonaire at 3am Sat morning!!  Tomorrow I have a workout + am trying out gear at the scuba pool + organizing cat sitters, etc for our trip.


Keeping the Light On

I’ve mentioned before about how if I’m out late at night running around my neighborhood that I’ve asked my sweet husband to never turn off the light downstairs so that I think he is awake with me.  I’ve been searching for someone my age, trying to do something similar, so I am not alone in this journey.  I’ve said to myself “I’m all alone” dredging up this old, untrue, verbal punishment I thought I had gotten rid of.  I know it’s not true.  I know there are plenty of athletes I can talk to at the box or my coach and that I have a wonderful family and friends.  I do know this – it is something we all worry about and just like I ask my husband to keep a light on in our home, I was thinking today that we should all keep a “light on” for others so they don’t forget they aren’t either.  It could be just asking someone how they are doing or inviting someone to dinner or sending a little note to a friend living far away.

I had first written in jest don’t use a headlamp but this post edit is about how you MUST use a bright headlamp as one of my very best friends suffered from depression and hung himself in his garage.  You can’t keep the lights on bright enough to make others realize they are not alone.

Here’s a shoutout to one of the best humans ever – Gunter you are missed.


Something Unexpected and Heartwarming

I became a stepmom in my 40s.  I survived and all of us are doing great. I remember that it took me into my 30s until I truly appreciated my own mother and still wonder what, if any, impact I have made on my boyfriends’ son, my stepson, my son – labels get all confused in these types of relationships just like the boundary lines of what we can say or not say, or care about or not care about, or ask or not ask….

A month ago we were driving in the car together while he was home at Christmas and I was working on posture with the lacrosse ball behind my shoulder in the car when he told me he was worried about me doing that because if we got into an accident, I could get extra hurt by having that ball there.  I thought it was the sweetest concern ever. Sometimes I’ve wondered if I’ve made a difference at all or, if I’ve damaged him in some way with the conflicts we did have (probably no different than any teen and their parents).  Anyway, it was a moment that mattered a lot to me.


p.s.  Main pic is probably at least six years old 🙂


Self Sabotage at the Bottom of the Scale

I lasted for months counting every gram of fat, protein and carb entering my body and being within +/- gram target a day.  Don’t understand now that I’m at the lowest weight ever why I’m struggling with the same to break into this ab six pack and just lean out a little more.  Every time I get to my lowest weight, I totally sabotage myself.  This week, on my workout day off, during a snowstorm, I stopped into the grocery store and walked out with a bag of Lays Salt/Vineger and some Lindt truffles (^&*&&^!!) and ate them on the hour drive home.  I’m standing at the register thinking this could be a great day or a bad day and I should put them back as I do not have self control with this type of crap in the house (or car as it may be). My tongue is still burning from the salt and vineger.

I know that no matter what shape you are in, the quality of food makes you feel better and perform better.

I know that I’ll feel bad later.

Do I not care about getting this six pack?

My boss told me I’m half the woman he hired yesterday (my husband told me I should have responded with I’m twice the woman you hired!).  I did my workout run last night – an hour intervals ~5.2 miles in the dark on semi-icy roads.



girl stuff

Hair evolution!  Embarrassing but here is a timeline of my hair starting with college to now (and I have selectively NOT included a few of the worst!):

Journey from senior year in college in 1989 (remember the perm?) thru ~1997:  And I had never worn lipstick/makeup until around 1997 when I got into ballroom dancing

then from 2001 to 2010…

And finally this most recent decade from 2013 to 2018… had to include the pic of teaching the kid how to shave 🙂

You can see how I always had kind of short hair since college and until this last year, always had bangs.  Not much you could do with it if you were working out, it just got wet.  Now I have to keep it out of my face while doing things like burpees or running in the wind.

Last summer I was at my brothers house and my 16 yr old niece showed me how to use the latest curling irons and I got one – as it grew out it was very frizzy and I just wanted it straighter.  Every time I was in London, it was a mess. She showed me the kind that you wrap your hair around and I gave myself a few scarring burns doing it – quit — complained to her and she enlightened me explaining that I need to use the glove that came with it!  So I’m good with that now and can curl or straighten my hair.

I just realized yesterday what those elastic larger bands are for (see blog main pic) …to keep the smaller pieces of hair out of your face.  I was in crossfit Friday night using two bobby pins to keep my hair out of my face and little and big hunks kept falling into my face while doing burpees.  I also just started to be able to put most of my hair up in a high, very small ponytail in back.

Now that I use some minimal makeup (can’t be bothered with it) and am coming up to speed at the age of 52 on hair, I am almost like a real girl!

I still haven’t figured out bra sizing….

Better late than never!



Hail to the Salt Truck! 2-6-19

I slid down my driveway thinking about being back in the hospital if I rip my shoulder up during a fall… After about two miles, a salt truck pulled into my neighborhood.  I raised my arms in victory and immediately ran behind it!  Conditions improved dramatically for the rest of the run.  Pic above are the ice chunks in my hair at the end.

I know I have a Masters Degree in Engineering from MIT but finally figured out why the headlamps tilt down (I always thought they were just kind of defective)!  I can get a good view of the street in front with them tilted down.  Love the headlamp and have no need for a hand torch anymore…


Around 5 miles I realized my legs and feet were going numb.  I ran back and forth on one side of the side of my neighborhood hoping to have my husband drive by and admire my toughness 🙂  He did not.

Bring it on!



Hangin’ with the Pros! My first bike fitting

I went to Fit Werx in Peabody, MA – my old stomping grounds!  Met Dean Phillips (who has the Men’s 40-44 3000m Pursuit Best Performance World Record), Marty Miserandino (multi-time Ironman), and my personal fitter Mike Meuse! The guys were all awesome and informative and just great folks to add to my personal support crew 🙂

Many things were measured:  inseam, feet length/width, arm length, and angles of all my appendages measured while taking a movie of me pedaling on my bike.  After reviewing my “as is,”  Mike made adjustments to my seat height and handlebar position (moved it further away from me). I also got my FIRST PAIR of clip-on shoes and pedals and triathlon shorts.  It is like I am ALMOST a real bicyclist!!

When I got home, I rode my Kickr Core Smart trainer but with so many new factors (pedals and position) it was hard to really know the full result.  I have immediately seen about 1kw/kg improvement in power – wowza!

And Goggins came up….he is everywhere and still gets me all worked up.

Done with scuba class, back at it with a better back, honest reporting and en route to middle age badassery,